February 28, 2002
From the desk of Jane Galt:Things I need to do
Things I need to do before I can edit my article on the Microsoft Civil Complaint
1) Reboot my computer
2) Clean the screen
3) Get Q-Tips and clean the keyboard
4) Readjust my chair
5) Look up the closing price of Microsoft on the day the AOL complaint was filed
6) Go to the store for more Diet Coke
7) Check my hit counter to see if anyone new is visiting
8) Search my name on Google to see why I'm getting hits from Alt.Sex.Spanking
9) Get another glass of Diet Coke.
10) Go to Microsoft to see if they have a response to the complaint. Download all relevant updates for my copy of Windows.
11) Search for legal clipart on the web.
12) Search for my ex-boyfriend the M&A lawyer.
13) Search for all my ex-boyfriends.
14) Get the bottle of Diet Coke from the fridge so I don't have to keep getting up.
15) Walk the dog.
16) Go through my old college yearbooks to make sure that my ex-boyfriend the M&A lawyer actually was once cute.
17) Readjust my chair.
18) Watch Friends.
19) That new show looks pretty good too.
20) Send my sister out for another bottle of Diet Coke.
21) Go to TurboTax to estimate my tax burden this year.
22) Buy books on Amazon.
23) Organize my pencils.
24) Highlight relevant passages in the complaint.
25) Make a list of all the things I have to do before I can edit my article on Microsoft.