January 3, 2003
From the desk of Mindles H. Dreck:The Abridged Two Towers
The Abridged Two Towers is very funny:
'Read it all', to coin a phrase.
HELM'S DEEPLEGOLAS: This is going to be most unpleasant. Hundreds of people will die.
ARAGORN: Thank you, Captain Obvious.
LEGOLAS: You're just jealous because I'm pretty.
ARAGORN: You're just jealous because I'm going to be king.
LEGOLAS: You can bite my ass....
----
ROHIRRIM GUARD: Sire, there are some really femmy people at the gate. They have bows.
ARAGORN: Those are Elves. Let them in.
ROHIRRIM GUARD: Oh! Elves! Wow, I didn't expect that.
PEOPLE WHO READ THE BOOK: Neither did I...
Posted by Mindles H. Dreck at January 3, 2003 4:40 PM | TrackBack | Technorati inbound links"); ?>
TO: Jane Galt
RE: Elves, Captain Strider! Hundreds of Em.
I wasn't expecting them either. But they worked.
And I did like their snappy facing movement; head turn followed by body, finally coming to order arms.
Must have got that from Robocop.
Chuck(le)
Posted by: Chuck Pelto on January 3, 2003 7:14 PMI havn't seen either film yet, I have read much Tolkien many times over, and...I laughed myself speechless.
Good parody is hard to find, a pearl of great price. Thanks for the link!
Posted by: Felicity on January 3, 2003 11:45 PMDitto on appreciating the shouldn't-have-happened elvish cohort at Helm's Deep as an otherwise excellent movie addition. Did you catch the toothy leer coming from the Rohirrim guard when the elves arrive?
The Two Towers continues and amplifies some of Peter Jackson's more notable interpretation: emphasis on the Ring poisoning men wherever it wanders, less fatalistic plodding about elves' flight and man's coming. I could have done without Entmoot settling on precisely the converse decision, or Treebeard's Hollywoodesque "nooooooooooo!" but after two cinema viewings, I can reconcile the differences between film and book (and enjoy them both).
And the illustrated struggle between Gandalf and the Balrog? CGI has come home and then some.
Posted by: Michael Ubaldi on January 6, 2003 3:40 PMComments are Closed.