October 5, 2005
From the desk of Jane Galt:Words to live by
Every so often, I randomly troll blogspot for new blogs. Today I came across this:
People often ask me, "Mister Juggles where should I invest?" or "How should I decide whether to buy Company X's stocks, bonds, options and exotic derivatives?" To that end, I have decided to create a list of investment rules that will allow readers to quickly qualify or rule out certain companies as potential investments. This process will continue over time as these rules come to mind.Rule #1: Avoid any company if the company's CEO responds to a legitimate question with profanity and/or personal attacks. This applies double if the profanity occurs during a quarterly conference call. Consider shorting the stock or buying out-of-the-money put options.
Rule #2: Avoid companies that engage in transactions wildly unrelated to their core business.
Check back for more later.
Rule #3: Avoid companies that have a CEO who wears clown shoes.
Funny site. I think you've just made some bloggers very happy. Of course, it doesn't have The Jane Galt Seal of Approval until it gets a spot on the right side of your home page, but it's a start.
MB
Enron....
#1) April 17, 2001 conf call...Skilling called an analyst an "@xxhole" when asked why ENE couldn't produce a balance sheet.
#2) Pulp and Paper, broadband, etc. in a nat gas/electricity company....
So far, the list describes Steve Ballmer's reign as CEO of MicroSoft:
1.) [from Wikipedia]Mark Lucovsky is quoted as having described a meeting with Ballmer as,
Prior to joining Google, I set up a meeting on or about November 11, 2004 with Microsoft's CEO Steve Ballmer to discuss my planned departure. [...] At some point in the conversation Mr. Ballmer said: "Just tell me it's not Google." I told him it was Google.
At that point, Mr. Ballmer picked up a chair and threw it across the room hitting a table in his office. Mr. Ballmer then said: "Fucking Eric Schmidt is a fucking pussy. I'm going to fucking bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again. I'm going to fucking kill Google." [...]
Thereafter, Mr. Ballmer resumed trying to persuade me to stay. [...] Among other things, Mr. Ballmer told me that "Google's not a real company. It's a house of cards."
2.) Microsoft's core business is providing operating systems and productivity software, yet they are intent on breaking Sony and Nintendo's hold on the videogame market with their XBox, and just recently called off talks with RIAA members on a subscription-based content delivery system. Additionally, they are courting Hollywood with their support of the HD-DVD format, even though their largest customers (HP, Toshiba and Dell) all support a compteting format).
[As for AllenS' "Rule #3", does this count?]
Actually, thats a wise decision on Ballmers part.
Microsoft has this problem:
Most of their revenue is from Office and Windows.
IBM already has a WebV2 (browser based) version of office, Sun has been working on one for years now, and there are a large number of Web V2/Ajax based office apps out there. It is likely their revenue base will be under serious strain soon.
It is not unprecedented in this industry. Apple and IPOD being the next closest example.
Microsoft started out as a game company (remember Flight Simulator?) and has had a line of games for it's entire existance. A prudent CEO would at least investigate the games divisions ability to add to the revenue stream.
The proper way to decide if a company will succeed is to research fundamentals, not personalities.
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